Movie Night VI: Direct to DVD

[unrecovered]

Who| Wash and anyone who wants to join
What| Movie night!
Where| The same lounge it's always in
When| After Time Ripples, Mind Slayer, and Wash Dies At The End
Warnings/Notes| Yet another classic!

It's been an odd few weeks, to say the least. Wash barely waits to be out of the hospital before he heads to the lounge to set up a movie night. He's had a request for a classic, and he'd managed to get in an order for the film before everything had gone batshit insane, so it's already arrived and he's just about ready to go.

The usual snacks and drinks are set up, along with a few mugs and goblets that are a little closer to theme. There's also the usual sofas and couches, draped with blankets and with bean bag chairs strewn around around the room. The usual sign hangs outside the door, with the movie's MPAA rating and a brief summary of the movie's plot, along with the usual note: Movie night is neutral territory.

The movie tonight, of course, is The Princess Bride.

Comments

[snoutback]

Roadhog straightens with a huff, then mutters at a volume that runs the risk of going entirely unheard: "I'll let 'em live." He carefully selects a vegan donut hole from the lot. "This time."

His mask lifts just enough to let his fingers in and out and swings back into place thanks to a pre-unbuckled neck strap, the powdery ball of cake no longer accounted for.

"Warrior Princess Xena but with six arms," he sums, chewing, being a snob for the fun of it. He'd probably watch it too.

[muroieda]

"Such a merciful leader," he coos, finally taking up a plate for himself to sample some other stuff that people brought. "Your subjects thank ya."

To Roadhog's observation, Junkrat opens his mouth and jabs a finger up into the air to make a point, but after some consideration, he actually relents. "Wonder if that's a coincidence," he mutters, lowing his hand. Would alien animators have found Xena transmissions from the past? Was it an intentional homage, just viewed through the lense of their own culture? Or did things just develop like that?

"I was gonna watch the last season again ta remember where the story left off. Do ya wanna watch it with me? It's not like watchin' Lawless, but..."

He shrugs.

[snoutback]

"But what?"

Both of his plates are piled high and ready to go, but Roadhog continues to steal morsels from the myriad of platters and bowls and pull his magic trick, snacking on this and that while he waits for Junkrat to take his share of freebies.

"Made you sit still," he says with a shrug of his own. "Gotta be decent."

[muroieda]

"Reckon you'd still like it," he finishes. "But I dunno about gettin' me ta sit still."

He grins. Junkrat never really sits still--even if you do get him to sit in one spot for longer than a minute, he's still gotta fidget with something.

"But it gets me ta shut up."

Now them's bragging rights.

[snoutback]

Roadhog's definition of the word still in relation to Junkrat is undoubtedly something that has become increasingly lax over the years.

He could ignore the jittering in his peripheral. He could tune out the looping laugh track. He could even suppress the urge to knock his boss unconscious when the little vermin ruined a serious on-screen moment with crass commentary, but the second Junkrat promises him a possible exemption from all of that Roadhog both stiffens and perks up at the notion, not unlike a dog that's just heard the sound of kibble hitting the bowl.

"Thursday's free," he offers after five stony seconds of deliberation, but that was nothing considering who was talking.

He sounds eager.

"Friday too."

[muroieda]

"Great!" Junkrat laughs, popping up in a significantly more akin to said dog. "We'll do Thursday so if we can't get through it all, we'll finish up on Friday. Schedule it in your phone," he orders, gesturing vaguely. Junkrat will be putting it in his own phone too, but when it comes to him, it's best that both people keep track of his schedule.

Just in case.

"I'm gonna go see if I can track down Fee," he says, after filling up his plate. "Find someplace all three of us can sit, yeah?"

[snoutback]

Both orders are acknowledged with a droll hum, afterwhich Roadhog simply collects his two leaning towers of food, wasting no time wandering off in search of a couch that could handle the two of them plus another body that scratched the two meter mark.

Luckily--for Fareeha, because Junkrat was used to tight squeezes and his scrawny ass could probably slither up a drain pipe--there were a couple of four-seaters in the room, and on his way over to the one closest to the projector screen, Roadhog has no qualms against swiping some of the blankets and pillows meant for the people who were going to be sitting on the floor.

Soon enough, the bodyguard could be found surrounded by his spoils, three squashed pillows sticking out from under his back, one behind his head, one hand crushing (hugging) another pillow patterned with tiny strawberries to his side. His boots are kicked up on a bean bag chair as he passes the time bringing more donut holes up to his now just barely uncovered lips. Meanwhile, the empty half of the couch has a single blanket haphazardly slung on it, large, dark, and velvety.

Just in case the happy couple wanted to do the rest of the world a favor and be covert with their cuddly crap.

[justice_from_above]

Fareeha follows Junkrat back to where Roadhog has confiscated a couch, and settles herself on the opposite end (thinking that her husband and his friend would want to hang out together). She settles into the seat and arranges her things on a side table (perhaps another reason for picking the end), and pulling the blanket aside so Junkrat can sit.

"Roadhog, have you seen this one before?"

[snoutback]

"Long time ago," he grunts in-between bites.

Before the center of Oz became an exclusion zone—that's what that particular choice of words almost always meant when it was Roadhog who used them.

"Your boyfriend's in it."

[muroieda]

Alright, now he's starting to feel left out. Why's he the only one that hasn't seen this?

Oh, right, because he can't sit still enough for most movies. The number of movies he's successfully managed to watch from beginning to end can probably be counted on less than two hands...and that's probably because they were animated or dark comedies. Junkrat startles at Roadhog's comment before he has the chance to sit down between them, having given Fareeha the head-start to get comfortable.

"Wait--wot?"

Surely he means as reference to something else. He'd know if he was in a movie! Most likely.

[justice_from_above]

Fareeha gives Roadhog a lightly confused look for a moment, before something seems to dawn on her and she sits back in her seat and laughs,

"Yes, you're right!"

When she catches Junkrat's look, she gives him a shrug and a bemused smile. "Swamp scene."

However much else of the movie he does or does not catch, she seems pretty determined to get him to see that bit.

[snoutback]

Mm, so she was aware she was dating a giant pest. Roadhog chuckles darkly as he languidly reaches over to his clueless partner, proceeding to yank him down onto the open cushion by the seat of his capris.

"You get stabbed by the main cunt."

Better not set his expectations high.

[muroieda]

Excuse you: married to a giant pest. There's a soft grunt when Roadhog pulls him into a seat, and lets out a distressed whine when spoilers are imparted upon him.

"Fareeha!" he yelps, whipping around to give her a brokenhearted look. You said that he would like that scene!

[justice_from_above]

She looks over, a little confused and bewildered. Was he complaining because Roadhog dragged him onto the couch, or ... oh, the scene? She chuckles and gives him a mischievous grin.

"Don't worry, I won't let anyone stab you."

[snoutback]

"Several times."

Roadhog adds, reveling in the anguished cry.

"With a sword."

[muroieda]

Junkrat squeaks, quickly curling up against Fareeha and tucking his head under her chin, as if he were scared of the non-threat. Given the difference in their size: yes, it looks absolutely ridiculous.

[justice_from_above]

She hooks an arm around him and pulls him in close.

"He'd have to get through me first, sweetie." She gives Roadhog a little grin over the top of Junkrat's head.

[snoutback]

That's cute, but the rat puppet is still going to cark it; Roadhog merely rolls his eyes and lets his cheek drop against the top of the closed fist he has propped on the armrest, shifting away from the commencing shmoop.

[muroieda]

"Given who we're talking about, that wouldn't be that difficult. Still--"

Junkrat lifts up his leg and presses the business end of his peg leg against the side of Roadhog's snout. He doesn't press all that hard--with Roadhog's mask hitched up enough for him to eat, it'd be too easy to dislodge it, and Junkrat would very much like to avoid that.

"--wouldn't make him any less of a grouchy cunt," he finishes, grinning wildly.