Amélie's eyes went wide and the hand not being held by Marjara started drumming on the sniper's thigh, fingers curled in and the muscles in her arms tight. What the elf suggested would be absolutely terrifying if Amélie could feel such things. It was one instant where her Apathy power really aided her as she otherwise may have physically left the campfire to get away from the situation.
Instead, she managed to keep her eyes on Marjara though her breathing became steadily faster. Unable to recognize the somatic response rising from the chemicals she couldn't feel being released into her body in a classic fight or flight response, her mind whirled at the possibility of what was suggested, of being 'fixed' much in the way she had considered having Sombra do. The difference was that Sombra was Talon and, more importantly, Sombra knew. The idea of letting these people know what was done to her and what she had--
Fingers now digging into the fabric of her pants, Amélie's nostrils flared and she wet her lips, before starting to move her head in what could have been either a nod or a shake before she stopped herself.
"Ou- Non- Je ne sais pas." She squeezed Marjara's hand - accidentally too hard - to stop her own from shaking. "I do not want to be that woman again. She was weak. A victim. The Widowmaker is none of those things." Then she shook her head a little. "But She may as well be an omnic, built on code and programs, designed to kill in an instant. I do enjoy killing... but it is more fulfilling when done by choice, not design."
Eyes closing, she fought to take a deep breath. "I... I cannot have anyone in my mind, Marjara. Not from here. Then they will know what I am, see what I have done, and they will trigger-- They will lock me up." One place or another - it didn't matter; she would still be locked up.
no subject
Instead, she managed to keep her eyes on Marjara though her breathing became steadily faster. Unable to recognize the somatic response rising from the chemicals she couldn't feel being released into her body in a classic fight or flight response, her mind whirled at the possibility of what was suggested, of being 'fixed' much in the way she had considered having Sombra do. The difference was that Sombra was Talon and, more importantly, Sombra knew. The idea of letting these people know what was done to her and what she had--
Fingers now digging into the fabric of her pants, Amélie's nostrils flared and she wet her lips, before starting to move her head in what could have been either a nod or a shake before she stopped herself.
"Ou- Non- Je ne sais pas." She squeezed Marjara's hand - accidentally too hard - to stop her own from shaking. "I do not want to be that woman again. She was weak. A victim. The Widowmaker is none of those things." Then she shook her head a little. "But She may as well be an omnic, built on code and programs, designed to kill in an instant. I do enjoy killing... but it is more fulfilling when done by choice, not design."
Eyes closing, she fought to take a deep breath. "I... I cannot have anyone in my mind, Marjara. Not from here. Then they will know what I am, see what I have done, and they will trigger-- They will lock me up." One place or another - it didn't matter; she would still be locked up.